Shine.
Delight.
Pleasure.
Comfort.
Belief.
Sensations.
Wisdom.
Trust.
You don’t seem to understand.
They don’t seem to understand.
It’s meant to be about excitement and I am meant to long for it.
And I do.
In my own dark silent way, instead of the joyful passionate way I normally would.
But there is that wall that I am trying to break down. That you’re trying to break down.
But I don’t know why we can’t do it together and why it won’t budge.
It may be one of the very last walls there is. The hardest one to break through.
The one I still haven’t managed to figure out.. And the one that brings all the others back.
Days are easier to get through when you learn to not care anymore… But boy are there consequences.
12 July 2011.
My best friend has a blog too..
And this is one of my favourite posts:
I could post a picture of one of the most beautiful girls on earth and add a clip in which you could hear her lovely voice, but I won’t. Because my best friend is MY hidden treasure, that I won’t share with anyone. And forgive me for being greedy.
She’s like a sponge, hold her, and she soaks up any emotion that you might have, and the only thing she leaves is happiness, pure, uncontaminated happiness.
Thank you God, for giving her to me.
Not only is he the definition of the best.
But, he is one of the few people that really know me.
And for him to say that, well you can imagine it meaning the entire world and more :)
I sit on the edge of the bed.
Eyes closed.
Trying to find my breath.
I feel the stars right by me,
Turning me into magical dust.
Overwhelmed.
Swirling in the midst of your thoughts.
How this 1 day and a handful of hours feel years away..
Exploring the depth of this sensation.
Fairy tale begun.
17th December 2011.
Happiness..
Is what you leave with me.
Understanding.
Ever so beautiful yet ever so ugly.
How you have to sacrifice to grasp.
To obtain is the skill.
The patience we need.
The lightness that you achieve.
The comfort and the discomfort.
Realization.
Acceptance.
Disappointment.
All muddled in one.
2 weeks – cries reality.
But I do not believe.
Years I say.
Years I feel.
Its the first voices and the last.
The spirtual touching.
The endless smiles.
And the little blushing.
The twinkle stars..
And the door bells..
The silent laughter..
And the s smells..
Fuzzyness and tingles.
And speechless again.
x
Shit hole.
That’s right.
Let me trash it down.
Let me bring out the horns
And let me see it burn.
Oh wait, scratch that.. Who am I kidding?
I forgot that’s your job.
